Maybe the hardest question I’ve faced as a youth pastor is when a dad asks, “How do I get my kids to want to do right?” Every parent struggles with the “How much is too much?” question. We parents feel the tension of: I make the rules as the God-given authority in my home I want my kids to see those rules as good. So, how much do I force obedience on my kid? Here are three real-life examples: Bible reading. Do I force my child to do it? If I do, will he rebel? If it’s forced, will she get anything
Read more →This Has Been the Main Culprit Behind Most (All?) Teen Problems Times be a changin’—I see a growing rumble of entitlement in teens. I hate to say “back in my day,” but back in my day, it was not quite so. Sure, we had spoiled kids, but even good church kids nowadays can coil into a “Don’t Tread On Me” stance when you threaten their turf: screens. And it scares me. When even the silicone valley dads refuse to give their kids screen time, I think they’re onto something. Maybe they have researched the brain (hint: they have[1]) and are more
Read more →One Youth Pastor’s Opinion (OYPO) – Vol. 40 ABORTION? PLEASE, NO. LIFE IS MEANT TO GLORIFY GOD. I preached last Sunday in church that life is meant to glorify God, and that abortion robs the opportunity for that baby to grow up and fulfill his purpose. If you missed the story, go to our website at https://cbctemecula.podbean.com/e/2019-01-27-abortion-life-is-to-glorify-god-bro-ryan-rench-sun-am/ to listen to the full sermon (and listen through to the very end). The content, though, was pretty simple. The main question is: “When does life start?” And the answer has biological, logical, and theological answers to it. I took a 30-minute stab
Read more →One Youth Pastor’s Opinion (OYPO) I Attend Conferences To Help Me Remember What’s Most Important I can pretty easily get distracted by an email, or a need, or a hobby; but I try to attend conferences like the Church Planters Conference in OKC to keep my eyes on what is most important. The Great Commission includes all the motivation one needs to keep the right focus: see people saved, baptized, and trained to follow Christ. That’s it, friend. One of Bro. Sam Davison’s sermons a few weeks ago essentially taught us to not overcomplicate these things. Christianity is pretty simple.
Read more →One Youth Pastor’s Opinion (OYPO) How To Welcome a New Youth Pastor The new year is a time to reminisce about the past year. But a new staff member brings a time to reminisce about the past era. Last night, we had our teen class in the newly renovated staff house. I talked to the teens about Joshua’s transition in, and his transition out. In both cases, God was with him, and the message was the same: love and serve God. Follow God’s Word. That’s been the message of our youth ministry, too. Coming in and going out, our message
Read more →One Youth Pastor’s Opinion (OYPO)… Respect Is Given, Not Earned Respect is given, not earned. Never is this more evident than when a new staff member comes on board. My first years in youth ministry started in college when I worked with the teen class. Having started college at 17, I was barely older than the teens themselves, yet by my junior year I taught occasionally, ran a youth activity and was generally given respect. Had I earned it? Nope. But they were taught to show it. After graduation, my wife and I moved to Stillwater where we helped with
Read more →One Youth Pastor’s Opinion (OYPO)… I Just Finished a Thank-you Note…To a Girl The young ladies of our church are the most precious people in the world. I just finished writing a thank you note to one of our teenage ladies who gave us a Christmas treat, but I texted the parents to let them know I was doing it. Sure, they’d see the note in the mail, but I want them in the loop. All the time. I’m not big on the helicopter parenting style, where the kids are pampered and babied so much that they never experience pain
Read more →One Youth Pastor’s Opinion (OYPO)… It Takes a Village My wife was buried in the passenger seat under a mound of popcorn treats. “Who’s that for?” I asked. “The teachers at church.” She said. “This is not even counting the choir members or adult teachers… just the ones who help our kids.” I was amazed. The old saying proves true: “It takes a village to raise a child.” We began to talk through who the treats were for, and, sure enough, each of the 20+ bags was for a separate person or family who invests in our kids. Nursery workers,
Read more →One Youth Pastor’s Opinion (OYPO)… Parents Parent. So, Parents, Parent. Parents are to parent their children. That’s what they do. They parent. The parents parent, that is… not the kids. The kids don’t parent. That’s the parents’ job. So, if you’re a parent, parent your kid. Apparently, some parents think their parents should parent their kid, but a kid should not be parented by his parents’ parents, but by his own parents. I seem to be confusing things. Here are someone else’s words on it: “Raise your kids; spoil your grandkids. Or else spoil your kids; raise your grandkids.” My
Read more →Dear People, Believe me, this was the greatest year we’ve ever had. We’ve never had such a good year as 2018, people, and this next year of the Rench family is going to be yuge. Let me start by saying that our kids are the best. Frankly, nobody makes cuter kids than us, and Abe’s intellect is at least 10 times–I don’t know, maybe 20 or 30 times, I don’t know–maybe 30 or 40 times greater than your kid’s intellect. He’s a special first grader with tremendous potential. He’s reading at a third-grade level. I’m being humble, I really am,
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