Christmas Cards | Ryan Rench | Pastor

Our Ridiculous 2019 Christmas Journey

RRench — Fri, 06 Dec 2019 21:47:13 +0000

First, I traveled through the seven levels Of the candy cane forest, Past the sea of twirly-swirly gumdrops, And then, I walked through my back door. It was a lovely door, All shaded over with a brand new pergola, And there, on the brand new porch, Was a brand new table With a glowing red button. Wanting to be a very good child And not touch what wasn’t mine, I ignored it for probably 20 years. But my brain said, “Push.” I walked to the table, Lifted my arm, Extended my finger, And pressed that button. It gave a loud

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2018 Christmas Greetings From President Trump and the Rench Family

RRench — Wed, 05 Dec 2018 15:48:19 +0000

Dear People, Believe me, this was the greatest year we’ve ever had. We’ve never had such a good year as 2018, people, and this next year of the Rench family is going to be yuge. Let me start by saying that our kids are the best. Frankly, nobody makes cuter kids than us, and Abe’s intellect is at least 10 times–I don’t know, maybe 20 or 30 times, I don’t know–maybe 30 or 40 times greater than your kid’s intellect. He’s a special first grader with tremendous potential. He’s reading at a third-grade level. I’m being humble, I really am,

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2017 Christmas Card

RRench — Mon, 04 Dec 2017 18:47:15 +0000

Merry Christmas! Dear friends and fam, Your cousin Peggy Dunglesniffer’s Christmas card is probably more interesting than this, but here’s the update on our family from 2017: With our kids, it really has been awesome! Age 5 (Abe) is super cool. Kindergarten is a breeze and Abe’s reading 10 verses of Proverbs each day. Champ! He got born again (see John 3 in the Bible) while we were in Indiana this year! Charlotte (3) has become our Michelangelo (the painter, not the ninja turtle, although she throws a mean round-house kick to the face). Her newest compulsion is drawing. And

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2016 Christmas Adventure – The Ryan Rench Family

RRench — Fri, 09 Dec 2016 16:43:44 +0000

It All Starts With a Strange Encounter… You’re bumping through the crowds at the County Fair when you notice a booth you have never seen before. It looks like a small circus tent with a flap for a door. The sign says “The Integration Experience,” and the strange man standing out front is saying, “Come in. Come in. We’re about to start!” You choose what happens next. To begin your adventure, CLICK BELOW Merry Christmas! If you opt out of the adventure, here are a few things that happened in the past year… Gwen Olivia showed up out of nowhere

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2015 Christmas “Thriller”

RRench — Thu, 08 Dec 2016 18:45:04 +0000

The Family Version: This section was the “family version” of the Christmas Thriller. Scroll down to begin the actual story… Hello friends and family! It has been a splendid year, as always. God has given us a wonderful family and church family. Our church events have continued as before. Adding a new secretary to our sta (Sarah Brown, Stillwater, OK) has been a HUGE help. We have continued helping with the youth and music minis- tries, and we are right now in full swing with a three-day Christmas outreach including a live outdoor choir and a fully-lit church building to

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Once Upon a Christmas Tale – 2014 Christmas Card

RRench — Thu, 08 Dec 2016 15:11:19 +0000

The following is a tale not altogether false. For other Christmas card letters, see 2010’s Christmas Epistle, the in-between years, or the 2015 Christmas Thriller. Once Upon a Christmas Tale Once upon a time in a land far, far away lived a young prince. Times were good in the land, and the king and queen were fair, loving people. The prince enjoyed all the pleasantries of royalty, spending his days coercing others to do his bidding. Subjects of his majesty included several ladies of the realm who were under a deep enchantment of his–some kind of dark magic. Entranced

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More Christmas Greetings…

RRench — Tue, 06 Dec 2016 20:32:27 +0000

Before breaking into the social media scene, our family gave an annual update through our Christmas letter. I already posted the Christmas Epistle (2010), written like a Bible account, but here are a few more we scrounged up from the past… 2009 Greetings from the hustling, bustling land of Stillwater—home of the world famous Oklahoma State Cowboys and, to be more germane, the Rench family. Life has been hopping for us in the big town—cow-tippin’… ‘coon-huntin’… tractor races, and the like. What a time! Actually, to be honest, we’ve never done any of those things, and we don’t say “and

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2010 Christmas Epistle

RRench — Fri, 02 Dec 2016 23:58:07 +0000

In this Christmas season, I’ve been reflecting on family and all our past Christmas notes. Here’s one of the first ones we sent. Enjoy, Ryan, a servant of the Lord and of Pastor Rench, called to be an associate and youth pastor, separated unto Calvary Baptist Church, from which I have grown and learned: To the 12 families of Jamie scattered abroad Indiana; and to friends and family in other like places, of like mind, scattered throughout the Midwest Americas of Oklahoma and beyond, and unto the uttermost parts of the earth; greeting. I thank my God to know

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